What To Do To Be "Hip"

Jordan's pending hip surgery is really giving me pause for thought! A three hour surgery, ~5 days in the hospital, and 6 weeks in a spica-cast are just the beginning. When Devon and I talked about it we decided that yes, she should have the surgery if her hip is causing her pain. Of course the problem with that is: Is it causing her pain? Will it cause her pain? Some people live with hip dysplasia without pain for years, and other suffer from the very onset. I wish we knew before we made such a big decision.

Jordan's already had general anesthetic 5 times, and done well with it*. Of course, though, now that we know a little more about her, I'm worried that being under general & the stay in the hospital will not only cause a temporary regression in abilities, but in some metabolic kids, an event like that can mark a downturn in their general health. But, as I said, she's already been fine with it 5 other times, so there's no reason to think it would be any different this time. Just something else for me to worry about.

Even the idea of getting a second opinion is almost too much for me. Jordan has already seen over 30 doctors in her life, and not 2 of them have agreed on much of anything about her. "She won't live to be 2" versus "better get finding a nursing home because she's in this for the long haul." "Yes she's having seizures" versus "no, she's not seizing at all." Genetic versus metabolic versus neurological. You name it, the doctors disagree about it.

So, although we are going to get her a second opinion before she has the surgery, I've already resigned myself to the fact that the next doctor will think her hip is fine & will suggest just living with it. Or having the surgery, but not the cast. Or, or, or. But, in the end, as usual, we'll just have to go with our gut on this one. Right now my gut is leaning toward fixing her hip & hoping that will give her some relief, some strength, possibly de-sensitize her a little bit, and maybe even keep her scoliosis from progressing at such a fast pace. Or, it might just be the beginning of the end.


*Except for having the record for the longest kid "out" on chloral hydrate at Children's Hospital of Michigan -- but she was okay when she finally did wake up.

The Part-Time Poser

Every once in awhile, Avery wants to do a "photoshoot" -- most of the time she wants to hide from the camera, though. This was her asking for some pictures the other night, a couple of different times. At least she doesn't bore the camera with simple smiles, but gives all her "faces" an equal shot.

Tea & Cookies

After Santa Katie & Heather came over for a girls tea party. They had the most fun making their own sugar cookies, even coloring them with food coloring markers.

The cookie team: Katie, Kate, & Avery

They had a hard time waiting until the tea party to eat the cookies, and the decorations, too, as evidenced by Katie's green tongue

Ho Ho Ho Time

It seems a little strange, I guess, but this afternoon I loaded up Jordan, Ashley (the nurse), Avery, & Kate, and we went to the dentist for a Christmas party. Even nana Noma joined the fun. It was actually really sweet. They all got to sit on Santa's lap, and there also was coloring, face painting, a bean bag toss for prizes, and of course, cookies & milk (at the dentist office!!). The girls all had a good time, and Jordan was the star of the party. The hygienists (elves) were absolutely fawning over her. She even got her face painted, too (and here I was worried about the sensory issues that might cause, but she handled it well). Jordan, Kate, & I all got candy canes on our faces, but Avery wanted a dinosaur. Not very Christmas-y, but I guess that's her "thing" right now. Avery also insisted on wearing her Santa hat, and to be honest, she wears it frequently these days. She's got the spirit!

When we were done at the party they ran around the lobby for a little while, burning off some of the cookie sugar. I finally got them to stand next to the tree for a few seconds.

The Hipster

Jordan had her 6-month appointment with the orthopedist at Shriner's Hospital today, and much to my amazement, they want to do surgery to correct her hip dysplasia. Since her last appointment in May it has moved out of the socket a considerable amount -- much more than expected for a "neurologically complicated" child. So much so that he considers her hip dysplasia a separate issue, and, all things being equal, she would probably have hip dysplasia even if she were a normally developing kid. He recommended surgery to repair and "redesign" the hip within 3 to 6 months.

I was shocked! When we met in May the doctors said they wouldn't do anything with it unless it was causing her pain. We don't really know when Jordan is in pain or not, but now they believe that we should consider the surgery seriously, because it is so bad that it probably is or will very soon cause pain. And considering she has a life of sitting to look forward to, we should try to make her as comfortable as possible.

Her spine is also quite crooked, but she is too young to be considered for treatment in that area. Eventually she will probably end up with rods in her spine to correct the scoliosis, but it sounds like that might be years away.

The one good thing from our meeting today was their assurances that there is really nothing we can do or have done to exacerbate these problems. Unfortunately, studies show that bracing, casting, & therapies do not slow the progression of scoliosis or hip dysplasia in children Jordan's age. That said, they suggested we continue using her back brace, physical therapy exercises, & positioning to try to keep her comfortable, but told us not to think that we're responsible for these problems because we just didn't do enough to prevent them. At least we have that, as we look forward to a major surgery & recovery in the spring. . . .

From The Forest To The Family Room

When I was a kid I would spend a long day with my dad cutting down Christmas trees for our family, my grandparents, the hired couple, the community club, the church, and anyone else that might need a tree that year. The snow was deep, but there was always cocoa when we were done to warm us up again. I loved these days, and to top it off, few things smell better than a fresh fir tree in the house.

Devon, on the other hand, suffered from allergies and asthma, and as a result grew up with an artificial Christmas tree, pulled out of storage each year for the holidays.

Of course we are both fond of the holiday traditions we had when we were kids, but when we "grew up," then became parents, we had to establish holiday traditions of our own. Devon couldn't wait to get a fancy new model, perhaps a pre-lighted Martha Stewart designed artificial tree. But as much as I try to compromise in general, I had to put my foot down on this one! I just can't bear the idea of an artificial tree, and I'd really miss the evergreen smell to go along with the season.

The first year we lived in Vancouver we bought a real tree from a lot.

The second year we took Avery on a Christmas Tree Train out in Yacolt, Washington, along with Kelly, Kate, & Ed. It was just like buying a tree off of a lot, except that we took a train out into the woods to pick out our pre-cut tree.

The third year we went south into rural Clackamas County, Oregon, to a tree farm, rode around on a wagon, and chopped down our own.

Last year we stayed a little closer to home & went north to a Ridgefield, Washington tree farm. Devon & Avery did the chopping, again.

But this year we finally took the plunge and headed out to the forest to find our own (and one for nana Noma, too). Devon joked that if he chopped down a scrappy tree I might let him pick one up at KMart on the way home, but in the end he was pretty happy about the event, and even said he liked the tree smell. Tradition established! I knew I could win him over with a little adventure*.

Here are some pictures of our adventures, with our neighbors Melanie & Galen, and their children Sean (6) & Sarah (3), in the Gifford Pinchot National Forest near Carson, Washington. It was nice to have my new camera along, but it was a bit bulky for this type of adventure. But I managed, happily.

All bundled up and ready for adventure. Jordan had the best deal -- she got carried and got to cut down the trees with daddy, too.
She did do a lot of drooling on Devon's shoulder, but that was as bad as it got. Phew!
Heading out into the woods
Above photo by Melanie Payne

Waist deep snow really tired out Sean, Sarah, & Avery. Eventually they were happy enough to just sit and play for awhile while we searched for the perfect trees.
Above photo by Melanie Payne
Above photo by Melanie Payne
Above photo by Melanie Payne
This one will do. Jordan cheers on Devon while he saws it down.
We got it!
Heading back for cocoa
Galen with the Payne family tree
Above photo by Melanie Payne
The triumphant tree-cutting dads
Above photo by Melanie Payne

SarahSeanAbove photo by Melanie Payne

AveryAbove photo by Melanie Payne
Michelin man coat & crazy hair -- oh well. Above photo by Melanie Payne

The family sweater picture. I made each of the sweaters in this picture. I am most proud of Devon's but of course you can't see his very well.
Above photo by Melanie Payne

The Payne Family: Galen, Sean, Melanie, & Sarah

After getting the trees sorted out we went up the road a bit farther for some sledding and snow angels. Avery only went down the sledding hill once, and was soon cold enough to retreat to the warm van with Sarah, Jordan, & I.

My snow angelsAbove photo by Melanie PayneAbove photo by Melanie PayneAbove photo by Melanie PayneAbove photo by Melanie PayneAbove photo by Melanie Payne
Above photo by Melanie Payne

Being silly in the back lead to a nice nap soon enough
Waiting on the deck to get the house ready for the tree
Devon insisted on scrubbing the floors, first (who can complain? I tried not to, but I was excited about getting the tree all set up!)First the lights
More decorations
The decorating team
All done with their masterpieceJordan watched intently, and got to play with some of the decorations along the wayAnd just because -- since Avery & Jordan's birthdays are so close to Christmas I set up this birthday tree just for them.

*And, as an added bonus, I just saw on the news that fresh local trees are extremely more environmentally friendly than foreign fabrication artificial trees. While alive they contribute to wildlife habitat & the atmosphere, and when dead they are recycled & their nutrients give back to the earth.